Managing Emotional Reactions

Athletes spend 90% of their time training. Tech leaders spend 99% performing. Guess who burns out first? Athletes practise skills deliberately. They build recovery into the plan. They stop before they break. Most teams in tech do the opposite. Every week is performance week. Every day is execution. Rest happens only when someone hits a wall. This is why burnout is so common in high-achieving teams. There is no space to reset. No time to reflect. No room to practise. Leaders fix this by building training and recovery into the system. Try this: → Add one protected block each week for reflection or skill-building → Run short debriefs after key work instead of just post-mortems after incidents → Give teams clarity on what is “practice time” and what is “performance time” High performance isn’t built through constant output. It is built the same way athletes build it. Through cycles of practice, execution, and recovery. Burnout is not a result of workload alone. It is the absence of training. And recovery. What’s one small way you build recovery into your week? ♻ Repost to help someone avoid burnout. ➕ Follow Liam Darmody for more. If this was useful, I keep related tools in The Alignment Reserve: liamdarmody.com/reserve

There is growing concern in corporate mental health, especially within the Middle East, where traditional, one-size-fits-all approaches to employee mental health often miss the mark. Given the current regional context, exposure to painful conflicts, employees face specific challenges—such as secondary trauma, vicarious trauma, and PTSD—that standard wellness programs might not adequately address. The current trend of expecting managers to bridge the gap between employees' needs and corporate mental health programs is problematic. While managers can and should offer support, expecting them to manage complex mental health issues without specialized training or resources is both unrealistic and potentially harmful. The solution would involve organizations adopting trauma-informed policies and creating a workplace culture that understands and responds sensitively to these needs. These could include: 1. When choosing mental health trainings or wellness programs, make sure they are culturally tailored and region specific. 2. Have trauma-informed policies and practices which could include defining boundaries around managers' roles in supporting employees, acknowledging that they are not therapists. These policies should focus on recognizing trauma symptoms, avoiding re-traumatization, and connecting employees to appropriate mental health resources. Also, considering flexible work options for employees struggling with their mental health or having a trauma reaction. These flex work options could include having a workplace that has quiet rooms, or allow for remote work days, or flexible hours, to allow space for self-care and recovery. 3. Offer access to mental health professionals who are both trauma-informed and culturally aware, partnering with regional mental health providers who understand the local context. 4. Expand the corporate “wellness” agenda to include workshops and seminars about vicarious trauma, PTSD, and secondary trauma, focusing on how these issues can affect them indirectly through news, social connections, or work responsibilities. 5. Offer employees routine emotional well-being check-ins with a mental health professional, where they can discuss their concerns in a confidential setting, especially after significant regional events or traumatic incidents. You can also consider group debriefings for teams who may be experiencing vicarious trauma due to their work or regional news. Structured support sessions can help individuals process collective experiences. #BigIdeas2025

𝐕𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐃𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 Olympic Silver medalist, Sara BALZER, provided some great insight into her mental approach to fencing and how this has helped well-being and performance. She spoke to Vogue about working with a psychologist and the impact this has had on managing the emotions she experienced: "I try to regain control of my breathing and concentrate on what I need to do. I have been working with a mental coach and a psychologist for several years to better manage stress, challenges, and the pressure of competition. Over time, I have come to understand myself better and know what I need" Sara uses a combination of breathing and visualization to help manage emotions during competition: "I practice breathing and visualization techniques. I try to assess how I’m feeling and what I need to do to perform well. I stay in my own zone throughout the day to remain focused on my goal and how to achieve it." 🌬 The Effects of Breathing and Visualisation on Emotions This corresponds to a study by Dana et al. (2022), who examined the effects of a mindfulness breathing mediation intervention and a mental skill intervention (which included visualization), and found that both techniques helped athletes manage their emotions more effectively. Further, Nien et al. (2023) explored the effects of mindfulness and relaxation on state anxiety and brain activation. Both interventions improved negative emotional states through the same neural pathways. 🧠 Managing Defeats by Generating Positive Emotions We know that losing can be very stressful, and Sara has a great perspective on this and helped generate positive emotions: "I find something positive in each defeat. I learn a lot from failures. They allow me to progress, question myself, and keep moving forward. This motivates me to improve each time. I apply the same philosophy in my personal life." Identifying positives from defeat involves appraising aspects of the situation as being beneficial to one's future development. Research with a sample of professional rugby union players by Nicholls et al. (2011) revealed that benefit appraisals generated positive emotions, and we know that positive emotions promote enduring personal resources to manage stress (please see Fredrickson's Broaden and Build Theory of Positive Emotions). Thompson et al. (2021) found support for this theory, reporting that the occurrence of pleasant emotions undo the effects of unpleasant emotional experiences. As such, when Sara is finding positives from a loss, she is generating positive emotions. According to theory and Thompson et al.'s finding (2021), this then broadens an athlete's attention toward more facilitative coping, and builds enduring coping resources. It also aids athletic performance, and potentially undo inhibitive psychological effects from previous unpleasant emotional experiences.

Emotional Detachment: A Lesson from the Bhagavad Gita for Today’s World In a world constantly pushing us toward achievement, competition, and comparison, it’s easy to become emotionally entangled with outcomes, opinions, failures, and even success. Amidst this chaos, the Bhagavad Gita, a timeless Indian scripture, offers a profound principle: emotional detachment. But what does that mean? And how can it guide us in our careers, relationships, and inner journey? “Karmanye Vadhikaraste, Ma Phaleshu Kadachana…” This famous verse from the Gita translates to: “You have the right to perform your duties, but not to the fruits of your actions.” This is the essence of emotional detachment—not apathy or indifference, but a wise disconnection from the outcome. It invites us to commit deeply to our actions while letting go of our attachment to results. In professional life, this could mean: Giving your best in a project without obsessing over recognition Navigating job transitions without fear or ego Handling criticism without internalising it Leading teams with compassion, not control Detachment Is Not Disengagement It’s a common myth that detachment means withdrawal. On the contrary, the Gita advocates engaged action with a steady mind. Krishna doesn't tell Arjuna to walk away from the battlefield but to rise above confusion and fight with clarity, purpose, and balance. In modern workplaces, this could look like: Taking bold decisions with calmness, not anxiety Managing workplace stress without letting it impact your peace Creating space between stimulus and response The Inner Shift: From Identity to Integrity When we overly identify with roles—employee, manager, parent, achiever—we tie our self-worth to external success. Emotional detachment nudges us toward integrity over identity. It reminds us that while we play many roles, our core self is beyond praise or blame. This mindset allows professionals to: Handle setbacks with grace Lead with humility Celebrate success without ego inflation Practicing Detachment Daily Mindfulness in Action: Be aware of your motivations. Are they outcome-driven or value-driven? Reflection: Ask yourself, “Am I reacting or responding?” Self-Inquiry: Am I holding on too tightly to control or approval? Letting Go Rituals: End each day by mentally releasing expectations tied to the next. Final Thought Emotional detachment is not about building walls—it’s about building wisdom. The Bhagavad Gita doesn’t ask us to stop feeling; it teaches us how to feel without being consumed. As leaders, employees, entrepreneurs, or educators, this ancient teaching offers a compass to navigate the emotional storms of modern life. Let’s strive to be fully present, deeply committed, yet inwardly free. #Leadership #EmotionalIntelligence #BhagavadGita #Mindfulness #Detachment #SpiritualWisdom #ProfessionalGrowth #InnerPeace #KarmaYoga #Wellbeing

Regulating your nervous system is a career builder. Our brains were originally wired for survival. When we perceive a threat, our cave-person amygdala activates a fight or flight response. This mechanism evolved to keep us alive, not to help us reason through a tough meeting. In modern work environments, critical feedback or public disagreement can be misinterpreted as a threat to status or safety. Once that alarm is triggered, the prefrontal cortex, responsible for reasoning and self-regulation, goes partially offline. The result is an emotional reaction that can feel disproportionate to the “real” situation. Withdrawing under pressure is a natural instinct. When the nervous system is flooded, shutting down can feel like a safe option. However, in an important meeting or decision, withdrawal can create more problems. It can erode trust and leave conflicts unresolved. Over time, repeated cycles of this can create feelings of chronic stress. “I don’t want to go to this meeting.” Managing reactions to feedback and conflict is about regulating your nervous system in the moment. One effective strategy is to pause before responding. Even a slow breath can reduce physiological arousal enough for the prefrontal cortex. “You got this.” Another is cognitive reframing: consciously labeling feedback as information, not a verdict. Asking a clarifying question, such as “What would good look like here?”, can shift the interaction from threat to joint solving. Staying engaged during the heat is a learned skill. Over time, practicing staying calm and engaged can retrain the brain to handle workplace friction. The goal is not to eliminate all emotional reactions, but to respond more deliberately, especially when the instinct to withdraw feels strong.

What do you control? And what do you choose to ignore— because it’s out of your control? One of the defining marks of an emotionally intelligent leader is knowing the difference between what you control, what you influence, and what you must let go. You can’t control people’s opinions. You can’t control every outcome. But you can control your response, your preparation, and your presence. The most effective leaders don’t waste energy on the uncontrollable. Rather, they channel it into purposeful action that builds trust, focus, and momentum. Here are 3 proven techniques to lead with clarity and emotional intelligence: 1) The Pause Practice: When faced with a challenge, take a 10-second pause before reacting. This resets your emotional state and allows your rational brain to lead. 2) Circle of Influence Mapping: Write down your top challenges. Next to each, note whether it’s in your control, influence, or beyond either. Then, commit your energy only to the first two circles. 3) Reframe the Narrative: Instead of asking “Why is this happening to me?” ask “What can I learn or influence right now?” This builds resilience and forward-thinking perspective. Leaders who master this balance stay calm in chaos, earn trust, and create emotionally intelligent cultures where people thrive. The truth? You can’t control the storm, but you can lead like an anchor through it.

“He thought aggression = leadership. He was wrong.” The country head walked into the room like a storm. Voice loud, footsteps heavy, eyes sharp enough to cut. In meetings, he snapped at juniors. “That’s a stupid idea.” “Don’t waste my time.” “Just do what I say.” Every word landed like a whip crack. At first, people obeyed out of fear. But slowly, the air in the office grew heavy—silence in corridors, fake nods in meetings, ideas swallowed before they were spoken. I still remember one meeting. A young manager, clutching her notepad with sweaty palms, tried to contribute: “Sir, what if we—” Before she could finish, he cut her off: “Not useful. Next.” Her face flushed. She sank back into her chair. And with her, ten other unspoken ideas disappeared from the room. Later, in a one-on-one, he told me proudly: “See, I run a tight ship. They know who’s in charge.” That was his vulnerability—he mistook fear for respect, and aggression for authority. I had to hold up the mirror. 👉 “Fear creates compliance. But it kills creativity. You don’t have a tight ship—you have a sinking one.” We started training him in assertive communication—firm, but respectful. • Replacing “That’s stupid” with “Help me understand your logic.” • Practicing listening without interruption. • Learning to challenge ideas without crushing people. At first, he resisted. “This feels too soft,” he said. But slowly, he began to notice the shift. Weeks later, in another meeting, the same young manager spoke up again. This time, he leaned in and said: “Go on. Tell me more.” The room felt different. Shoulders relaxed. Pens moved again. Ideas started flowing. And at the end of the quarter, when his team hit record numbers, he admitted: “I thought respect came from fear. I was wrong. Respect comes from trust.” 🌟 Lesson: Aggression silences. Assertiveness empowers. Fear creates short-term compliance. Respect creates long-term results. Great leaders don’t intimidate their teams. They inspire them. #ExecutivePresence #LeadershipDevelopment #CommunicationSkills #SoftSkills #Assertiveness #Fortune500 #BusinessGrowth #TeamCulture #Leadership

Three seconds changed everything. If you find yourself snapping at someone before they've finished their sentence, shutting down an idea before it's had a chance to breathe, or walking out of a difficult conversation feeling like you made it worse, This is worth sitting with, before it’s too late If you are able to notice before taking an unnecessary action, then that’s a good start, and it’s how great leadership actually lives. This usually starts with a PAUSE. When pressure enters the room,  give yourself three full seconds before you respond. Don't defend, don't correct, and don't shut it down  before it's had a chance to land. Most leaders skip this step entirely,  and it costs them more than they realize. After three seconds, CLARIFY. Ask a question before you make a statement and watch how something shifts. Your shoulders drop. The tension in the room softens.  And you start hearing what's actually being said instead of stressing yourself Then, NAME IT. When I look at someone and sense that they're being difficult, I name it quietly to myself, let the thought pass, and move on. It sounds simple, but naming what you're feeling internally (without acting on it) is one of the most underrated tools in leadership. The moment you put a word to it, it loses its grip on you. Finally, REFLECT. At the end of every high-pressure week, ask your team one honest question: "What's the load like right now?" Listen. Then act on what you hear. So, remember those three seconds. That’s all it takes to ground yourself in who you are before the pressure decides for you.

How your emotions are costing you millions in the boardroom. In negotiations, emotions can be your biggest liability.  For example: 👉 The vendor you loathe?   You walk away from deals that serve your interests—just to "win."  👉 Trust a partner too much?   You give away value without realizing it.  I’ve seen this happen in boardrooms more often than you’d think.  And it’s costing companies millions.  That’s why I teach the "Friends & Foes" principle. It's straightforward: Focus on the deal, not the person across the table. Negotiations aren’t about the people. They’re about the issue. But our emotions blur that line.  When we like someone, we bend too far backward.   When we dislike someone, we sabotage ourselves out of spite.  The solution? Separate the person from the problem. Here’s how I help my clients do this:  1️⃣ Play "Friends & Foes": In my workshops, we run this exercise:   - Negotiate with a "friend" (someone you trust).   - Then switch to a "foe" (someone you distrust).  For every decision, ask yourself:   - Would I make the same choice if this were the other person?  If the answer is "no," your emotions are influencing you.  2️⃣ Reframe the negotiation: - Replace “Who am I dealing with?” - With “What am I solving?”   - Focus on facts, data, goals, - Not relationships.  3️⃣ Build Emotional Detachment: This isn't about becoming cold. It's about staying clear-headed so you can spot real opportunities, no matter who presents them. Here's what this looks like in real life: Imagine you're about to turn down a vendor's proposal because their past mistakes made you angry. But their new offer could save your company six figures. Using the "Friends & Foes" principle, you’d:  - Remove your personal grudge.   - Assess the deal objectively.   - Make the decision that - Serves your business, - Not your emotions.  That’s the power of separating people from problems.  Are your emotions undermining your negotiation outcomes?  Let’s fix that.  Join my Negotiation Mastery Workshop to learn:    ✅ How to neutralize emotional biases.   ✅ The "Judgment-Free Zone" framework.   ✅ Advanced strategies to protect your interests at every table.  Want to stop leaving money on the table? DM me to secure your spot. ---------------------------------- Hi, I’m Scott Harrison and I help executive and leaders master negotiation & communication in high-pressure, high-stakes situations.  - ICF Coach and EQ-i Practitioner - 24 yrs | 19 countries | 150+ clients   - Negotiation | Conflict resolution | Closing deals 📩 DM me or book a discovery call (link in the Featured section) 

He's not having an easy time of it, Red Bull Racing's Liam Lawson. He's basically living every high performer's dream and nightmare, all wrapped into one. https://lnkd.in/eXgBA5tn He's on the grid, he made it to the big team, but the pressure is intense. The media are absolutely relentless in their scrutiny of his results. As they say, F1 is not a finishing school, and two race weekends in speculation about his seat has already started. How do you deal with pressure? You may not be driving a 350 kph racing machine, but maybe you're a first-time manager, wanting to prove yourself after a promotion, or operating in an environment where mistakes are very visible. The context is different, but the neuroscience is the same. Under extreme pressure, your brain’s threat detection system (i.e. the amygdala) goes on high alert. It can trigger a stress response, even when you're not physically in danger (just mentally overwhelmed). This makes it harder to access your prefrontal cortex, which is the part of your brain responsible for clarity, decision making, and problem solving. So how do you stay cool when you feel like the whole world is waiting for you to fail? There's no silver bullet, but neuroscience provides some answers. 𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭: 𝗡𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝘁. Label the feeling. Say 'I’m feeling anxious' or 'This feels like a high-stakes moment'. Naming emotions, saying them out loud, immediately takes away some of their power. You will reduce their intensity, and it will help bring your prefrontal cortex back online. 𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟮: 𝗡𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀. When we're feeling pressured it can make us us want to prove everything, all at once. But performance improves when we reduce the noise, and focus on just one or two controllable variables. For Liam that might be consistency through corners. For you it might be preparing your pitch, or delivering a high quality report. 𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟯: 𝗗𝗲𝘁𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲. This one's the hardest, especially when you are truly invested in what you're doing. Things will either work out, or they won't. You will still exist as a person. You are not the outcome. Losing doesn't make you a loser. The brain performs much better when it sees setbacks as data, and not a threat to your worth. You are not your pitch, your report, or your lap time. So whether you're on the F1 grid or in the boardroom, the principle is the same: You don’t rise to the occasion. You fall to the level of your training. Don't forget to train your mind. #HighPerformance | #Mindset | #F1 | #ChineseGP