Choosing The Right Career Mentor

𝘔𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘪-𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘷𝘴 𝘈𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘺? Over the last 2-days, I've had 2 separate mentoring sessions with 2 emerging speakers. This is something I love doing, and I noticed an interesting pattern emerging: 𝗠𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗲 𝟭: • Her speeches have often been energetic, humorous and light-hearted. Because of this, people in the community seem to pigeonhole her as entertaining speaker. • However, as I help her dig into her story, I saw a resilient, strong-minded lady of tremendous gumption. • She told me, "Actually Coen, this is who I really am. I want to be authentic and I want my message to embody my spirit!" 𝗠𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗲 𝟮: • Having known her for 3 years, I've always seen her as a no-nonsense senior corporate leader who wants to transition into speaking. • Her previous speeches contained serious messages about change. • However, in a recent mentoring session, she had an epiphany that took her back to her childhood memories, and unveiled a delightful, more playful angle to her. In both situations, the mentees showered deeper layers to them. But that's humanity isn't it? We are not one-dimensional human beings but multi-faceted individuals, wearing different hats, have varied interests, and bringing our own unique "wisdom stack" to how we show up. However, it is human nature to categorise people in order for us to make sense of streams of multiple, we employ "mental shortcuts" (psychologists call them heuristics). We tend to label people, and pigeonhole them into a certain way. Our confirmation bias then picks up only evidence to reinforce our narratives about them. So here's how things panned out in the mentoring: 𝗠𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗲 𝟮: She's always LED FROM deeper conviction, but Leading WITH childlike innocence makes her more approachable and relatable. As she started crafting light-hearted stories with deeper messages embedded, her audiences responded even better to her. She found her magic! 𝗠𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗲 𝟭: She runs the risk of allowing people's opinions about her as an entertaining speaker to define her. I call this the "Lead 𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩" - the public self, or brand that you portray to the people you speak to, or lead. However, as she passionately shared with me, there are multiple layers within that drives her passion for speaking. I call this the "Lead 𝘍𝘳𝘰𝘮" - the deepest space within that drives your leadership. In order for her to reverse people's views that she's "just a funny speaker", she needs to change the stories she shares - from just funny ones to ones containing deeper messages that she wanted to convey - delivered in her usual exuberant and humorous ways! Here's the hard truth: 𝗣𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀 - 𝗜𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗠𝗶𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗶𝗺𝗲 - 𝗔𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗬𝗼𝘂. If you don't tell your own stories, others will tell them for you anyway, and you may not like it. The good news is that, with awareness and craft, you can tell better ones yourself! #MagneticStorytelling

Don’t just ask someone to “be your mentor” — be intentional about how you work with them. Mentorship has shaped my career in big ways. One of my earliest mentors was an interim pro-vice-chancellor when I worked at a university. That relationship led to the opportunity to work in India — something I never could have planned, but which completely shifted my trajectory. I still work with mentors today, so when people approach me for mentorship, I try to help where I can. Enter Iqra Ali. She recently reached out with the perfect approach — clear, thoughtful, and showing she’s driven, passionate, approachable, and ready to put the work in. And that’s the difference. Mentorship works when the mentee drives the relationship. From both sides, here’s what I’ve seen matters most: ✅ Be clear on what you need support with ✅ Do your research before you reach out ✅ Come prepared and on time ✅ Keep your mentor updated on progress ✅ Follow up promptly — respect their time Beyond the basics, mentorship can also be strategic: ✅ Learn from people indirectly (blogs, podcasts, videos, talks) ✅ Build a network of mentors, not just one ✅ Set yourself weekly challenges to apply advice ✅ Invest in yourself — through mentors, courses, and training I truly believe mentorship can be a game-changing investment. But it does require time, and sometimes money. If you’re clear on what you want, open to feedback, and willing to put the work in, the return on this investment will continue to pay off again and again throughout your career. #mentorship

Mentoring is one of the most powerful relationships we can build. Over the years, I’ve had the privilege of mentoring some truly remarkable individuals—both formally and informally—and it’s been one of the most rewarding parts of my career journey. It’s not just about offering guidance or helping someone overcome challenges. It’s about nurturing leadership, elevating others and fostering a culture where everyone feels like they belong, where every voice is heard and where everyone is empowered to succeed. Earlier this week, we celebrated MentorHer Day, marking not just the conclusion of many mentorship journeys, but the start of something far greater. Since the programme’s launch in 2018, we’ve mentored over 1,000 women, helping them step into leadership roles, broaden their skills and grow in confidence. And the impact doesn’t end there—together, we’re creating a ripple effect of empowerment that will resonate far into the future. This isn’t just a programme—it’s a promise to help women dream bigger, aim higher and achieve more than they ever thought possible. Listening to the personal stories shared on MentorHer Day, I was deeply moved. These are my three key takeaways – and not just about what mentorship gives, but what it asks of us:         • Mentorship can build lifelong relationships When the formal mentorship relationship ends, the bonds and connections formed during that time don’t have to. Cultivating authentic, personal connections—a safe space where mentees can be open about their dreams and aspirations—can build relationships which grow into enduring bonds and friendships that transcend the workplace. • Mentorship is a two-way street The real beauty of mentorship lies in its reciprocity. Every time I mentor someone, I gain fresh perspectives—not just about them, but about myself and my own leadership style. Mentorship holds up a mirror, allowing us to see where we, too, can grow and improve. No two mentorships are ever the same and that’s what makes mentorship so much fun! Some of my best mentorship moments have happened outside the traditional office setting – treadmill meetings or a cozy coffee shop where the usual hierarchy fades away and both mentor and mentee can contribute equally to the journey.  • Mentorship is about paying it forward The true power of mentorship lies in its ripple effect. When mentees become mentors themselves, they create a legacy of empowerment—passing on the confidence, tools and sense of possibility that encourages the next generation to achieve even more than they once believed possible. That’s the true power of paying it forward.    To all mentors and mentees, you are the heartbeat of initiatives such as these. You’re not just creating opportunities—you’re helping shape futures. Thank you for being part of something so impactful. As I said on stage: Let’s keep making waves.

Embrace the power of “story-mentoring”! Every mentor needs to utilize the power of storytelling. Often, we overlook the wealth of experiences we have accumulated, failing to recognize how much we can impart to our mentees. Recently, I had two sessions with my mentees that reminded me of this crucial aspect. During our discussions, we focused on how they can better influence others. One mentee, who has made the transition from a more assertive sector into social impact, is navigating her first corporate job at Micron Technology. While she's incredibly passionate and covers a lot of ground, I noticed she often approaches interactions forcefully, which can lead to information overload for those around her. This led to a significant “aha” moment for her, as she realized that her fast-paced and firm style stemmed from her background in a very take-charge industry. To help adapt her communication skills to her current environment, we discussed how pausing, listening, and paraphrasing can yield much better engagement and influence. Storytelling emerged as a critical component in this mentoring relationship, helping her connect with others on a deeper level. At the beginning of the year, I was invited to speak to a group of women as part of Micron's initiative to advance women's progress. Reflecting on my own journey, I shared insights about how to pause to propel - essentially a mindset shift. I likened it to playing checkers versus chess, emphasizing the importance of preparation in leadership. Shifting the focus from merely doing things right to understanding the right impact also plays a vital role in mentoring. We anchored our discussion around creating those crucial “aha” moments for mentees by blending mentoring with storytelling; a concept I like to call “story-mentoring.” When I think about mentorship, I envision mentors and mentees leveraging storytelling to share experiences, allowing personal stories to illuminate lessons. Mentoring should never feel like a one-sided lecture; it’s about showing, not just telling. Embracing the art of storytelling in your mentoring relationships is not just about imparting knowledge; it’s about creating connections and fostering understanding through shared experiences. Let’s turn our stories into powerful mentorship tools!    #Mentor #Mentee #Storytelling #Experiences #Understanding 

Mentorship Is Not a Metric. Real growth doesn’t come from logging hours—it comes from sharing lives. Mentorship isn’t a spreadsheet. It’s not a formal match program or a checkbox on someone’s professional development plan. And yet, in today’s workplace, we’ve reduced it to exactly that—a system of assigned advisors, scheduled coffee chats, and tracked outcomes. But we’ve missed something vital. When I first moved to New York City at 24, I had no job, no college degree, and no real plan—just hustle, hope, and the phone number of a man my father had once met: actor Tony Lo Bianco. I called him looking for a crash course in acting. What I got instead was an education in life. Tony didn’t want to see my list of questions. He handed me a rock and said, “Ask it something.” We spent hours in dialogue—not about scenes or scripts, but about stories, history, human nature, and what it means to really pay attention. That was the beginning of a mentorship that would span five years, hundreds of theatrical performances, and thousands of shared hours. Tony didn’t mentor me because he had to. He wasn’t “assigned” to me. There were no quarterly goals or feedback surveys. He mentored me because he saw something in me—and because he, too, needed connection. This is what we’ve lost. Today, companies tout “mentorship programs” with performance metrics, tracking hours and feedback forms. Employees are “matched” by software, assigned mentors as part of onboarding, or told to log mentoring time for promotions. But these are empty rituals. Because real mentorship can’t be measured—it can only be felt. Real mentorship is a conversation, not a contract. It’s curiosity without a clock. It’s showing up when it’s inconvenient. It’s the courage to listen, the humility to share, and the willingness to be changed. Tony and I were messy, but we were human. As mentor / mentee, we laughed, we argued, we mirrored each other. And that’s what true mentorship is: a mirror held up by someone who sees you, who challenges you, who believes in you even when you don’t believe in yourself, me a 24 year old dreamer at the time. If you are a leader, a parent, a teacher—someone who has lived, struggled, and learned—then you are capable of being a mentor. I challenge you: Don’t mentor to check a box. Mentor to change a life. And don’t be afraid to let your life be changed in the process. Also, while you're at it, go thank the people that mentored you, even from afar.

The goal of legal mentorship is not a hire-back. That sounds wrong, doesn't it? For years, I thought the definition of a successful mentor-mentee relationship was simple: make sure every student gets the job. But when I spoke with Faren Bogach, she shared a shift in perspective that every junior and partner needs to hear. "When I first became a mentor, my goal was to make sure all my mentees get hired... by the third year, I realized that wasn't right for everyone or possible for all of them." She realized the "invisible" part of the profession that no one teaches: The goal is the experience, not the offer. Here is what real mentoring looks like: → The Deep End: Give them the independence to take real steps. → The Life Preserver: Don’t walk away. Be right there, coaching them on what to do, ready to jump in if they sink. → The Conversation: When mistakes happen, talk about the options and how to do it differently next time. No blame. No shame. So often, we focus on the deal, the win, or the billable hours. But what actually shapes a lawyer is having someone in their corner when it matters most. The best way to learn isn't through perfection. It's through supported failure. In this episode of Studying Law Around the World Podcast, Faren and I dive into rebuilding law firms and construction litigation. But her insights on the "safety net" of mentorship are gold for anyone building a career. Listen to the full conversation here: https://lnkd.in/eFc4TyFd

Mentorship isn’t a one-way street. It’s a reciprocal exchange. We often think of mentorship as a senior-to-junior relationship where one person “teaches” and the other “learns.” But the most impactful mentorships I’ve seen are two-way. When a founder seeking guidance partners with a mentor who’s also open to learning, both grow. It’s a balanced dynamic where insights, challenges, and perspectives flow in both directions. For example: - The mentee might bring fresh industry insights, innovative approaches, or new market trends. - The mentor provides battle-tested experience, guiding the mentee around common pitfalls and expanding their strategic view. - This exchange creates mutual respect and a deeper understanding. One that goes far beyond the conventional mentor-mentee dynamic. Here’s how to build reciprocal mentorship: - Be intentional about what you bring to the table. - Listen actively and be open to your mentor’s feedback and insights. - Share your own strengths and experiences in return, creating a genuine dialogue. - Reciprocal mentorship is transformative for both parties—and it builds a lasting network of allies and champions. Have you experienced a mentorship that went both ways? What made it work?

Memoirs of a Gully Boy Episode 32: #Mentorship – The Bridge to Collective Growth In every career, there comes a point when the focus shifts from personal success to creating opportunities for others. Mentorship is that bridge—a powerful tool that not only shapes individuals but also builds stronger teams and organizations. The Early Lessons in Guidance One of my first experiences as a mentor came during a high-stakes project involving a new hire fresh out of college. The project’s complexity overwhelmed him, and mistakes became frequent. Instead of micromanaging or criticizing, I walked him through the basics, shared my own early career struggles, and gave him the space to learn. With time and encouragement, he gained confidence and delivered key components of the project. Watching him grow and succeed was as rewarding as achieving the project’s goals. Lesson 1: A mentor’s role is not to provide all the answers but to enable others to find their own. During a process optimization project for a manufacturing client, I worked closely with a team of young managers. While they were technically sound, they lacked the leadership experience needed to navigate high-pressure situations. I introduced them to structured decision-making frameworks, helping them break complex problems into manageable steps. Within months, they were not just solving problems but leading sub-projects independently. Some of them eventually rose to senior leadership positions, proving that mentorship creates a ripple effect that benefits individuals and organizations alike. Lesson 2: The best mentors don’t just develop problem-solvers—they cultivate future leaders. Learning Through Reverse Mentorship Mentorship isn’t a one-way street. I’ve often found myself learning from those I mentor, particularly during innovation-driven projects. In one instance, a young team member introduced a new data visualization tool that significantly improved our ability to analyze and present key metrics. His fresh perspective enhanced the project and reminded me that mentorship is about fostering mutual growth, where both mentor and mentee evolve together. Lesson 3: Mentorship thrives on mutual learning—it’s as much about listening as it is about guiding. The Role of Empathy in Mentorship Mentorship isn’t solely about technical guidance; it’s about understanding the challenges your mentees face. During a critical software migration, one team member struggled with personal issues, affecting his performance. Instead of pressuring him, I offered flexible deadlines and support, enabling him to focus on both his work and personal life. That experience underscored the importance of empathy in mentorship—creating a safe environment where people feel supported, not judged. Lesson 4: Empathy builds trust, and trust transforms mentorship into a lasting Partnership Mentorship is a cornerstone of professional growth. It’s the act of lifting others, shaping future leaders To be continued...

Going from leader to mentor builds a 2-way street to success: Here's why the best leaders are also the best teachers. The mutual learning process is key to rapid growth. Both mentor and mentee gain valuable insights. Mentorship isn't just career advice. It's a career accelerator. Here's how to find and create game-changing mentor relationships: 1. Know your growth areas • Identify specific skills you need to improve • Example: "I need to get better at financial modeling for pitches" 2. Find the right mentors • Look beyond LinkedIn - attend conferences and join forums • Find successful people who aren't in the spotlight • Consider mentors from different industries for new ideas 3. Make a strong first impression • Mention their work that impressed you • Show how their skills match your career needs • Share an insight about their work to start the conversation 4. Be ready for each meeting • Write a brief summary of your goals and progress • Update them on how you've used their previous advice • Prepare 2-3 situations where you need their help 5. Give back to your mentor • Test their new products or projects • Introduce them to new talent in their areas of interest • Help build their personal brand through speaking or writing 6. Build a diverse mentor network • Mix long-term mentors with short-term advisors • Example: An industry expert, a tech guru, and a rotating specialist • Review your mentor relationships every 6 months 7. Set clear goals • Use objectives and key results to guide your relationship • Check progress every three months • Be open about your career moves and ask for their advice 8. Learn from mentors indirectly • Study their career choices through research • Try out one strategy from each mentor every month • Keep a log of what you learn and how it helps you grow The best mentorship relationships evolve into collaborative partnerships. Aim to reach a point where you're brainstorming solutions together, not just receiving advice. P.S. If you found this valuable, repost for your network ♻️ Join the 12,000+ leaders who get our weekly email newsletter: https://lnkd.in/en9vxeNk Lead with impact.

When I decided to switch from Geology to Science Education, I didn’t expect some of my academic mentors to understand. But the reaction of a particular mentor continues to be a priceless gift to me. Switching meant I had to leave the PhD program I started in Geology. My Geology PhD advisor, who has been a dear mentor to me since my undergrad days, knew this meant I would be "leaving him." Yet, he was one of my most important supporters. He affirmed my decision and provided practical support in every way. He advised me on how to go about making the switch. He even shared how his own experience as a professor proves the point of my intended research: that higher educators, particularly in the sciences, need to learn about teaching just as they learn their subject matter. He wrote recommendations for me and even advised me on how to systematically break the news to other people who wanted me to continue in Geoscience. That experience taught me an important lesson in mentorship: As a mentor, you need to give your mentees their agency. Even though they have allowed themselves to be influenced by you, giving them space to make their own decisions without a grudge on your end is one of the most empowering gifts you can give them. As a mentor, you must always remember to respect the trajectory of your mentee’s life. They are different from you. Your work is not to make their journey look like yours; rather, it is to provide an environment where they feel empowered enough to find and follow their path, even paths you may not understand at some point. One of the ways to know if your mentoring work is making the kind of impact it should make is when you can trust your mentees to make correct decisions on their own without your interference (and sometimes understanding). #OluwatoyinAjiloreChukwuemeka